Being with my mom at The Block Center during my treatment created a different dynamic this week. I would say there were other factors that made the experience different in the first place. For instance, I was not recovering from anesthesia this time around. While I was coming in a little weaker than the first treatment, having just started feeling more like myself for maybe 4-5 days before having to return, I believe I was still in a better place. My body does not deal well with anesthesia. I need prayer surrounding that for my upcoming surgery later this summer...(more on that later).
It was nice to have my mom there so that she could experience The Block Center as compared to the sometimes/somewhat traumatic memories we share of our time together during my first cancer treatment. We did recall all of the blessings during our time in 1991-92 and all of the amazing people we met on our journey. It seems whenever you are in a dark spot of life the light of resiliency and hope still shines so brightly. We met many bright and hopeful people that year going through some of the most difficult things I had ever encountered.
At the Block Center this week my mom introduced herself to many of the people around me. I, being more alert and aware this week was able to interact as well. It was a pattern and style of interacting that I remembered well from our first days in the hospital in Michigan, learning our way through the hallways, medical-speak and way of life as full-time cancer patient/caregiver. My mom and I, in those days, had designated ourselves as the welcoming committee at Mott Children's Hospital in Ann Arbor. We provided an unofficial orientation of sorts. We gained many friends that way and worked to encourage others as they began their cancer journey.
That day at The Block Center, in a much different setting than the clinical one we had spent much time in in the past, led by my mom's extroverted introductions, we strolled the hard-wood floors and smiled at others sitting in their recliners, stopping in to chat when the opportunity arose. It was nice to talk with others and hear their stories, journeys and struggles. While every experience was so different there was comfort in knowing we were not alone. I hoped that our story and struggles were in some way comforting to those who listened as well.
Today, as I write this, I realize there is much more to say on this subject but my mind is so sluggish. I've been very tired and somewhat lethargic today. My body is recovering. My mind is trying to keep up.
Earlier today, soon after first waking when I was at my sharpest, I read this article, link provided here: http://christinecaine.com/content/my-story-of-healing/gjm8iw Christine Caine is a writer, speaker, singer, worship and ministry leader from Australia. The article she wrote about her cancer experience is yet another account of faith, fear, healing and struggle. It is a hopeful account of one woman's journey and that is why I share it.
I remember even in my weakest days in 1991-92, nurses would ask if they could send someone in to talk, or if I would feel up to meeting "the new kid". My mom probably did more than I, spending time and sharing tears with other parents, while we the patients slept. I know this: we draw strength from one another. Hearing about the testimonies of strength and hope in the midst of pain and suffering encourages me to dig deep and find the fortitude I need to carry on. And in the times I feel I have nothing to give I know that merely sharing my struggle with another may just be the encouragement they need to find the way through their own challenge.
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